You’ll be travelling at super high speed while planning items for a wedding such as cake tasting, flowers and venues. While you determine your centrepieces, don’t forget to also consider who will be standing at the very center of everything – that’s right, your officiant! Go ahead, think about it… who will create the tone for your marriage? This person is the one to guide you through your big day; no, he does not have to be the one who reads the vows but someone who can appreciate the importance of the past through humour and the vast tradition that is encompassed within the act. Find someone who has performed many different types of ceremonies and has been involved in the planning of their success. This will help to ensure that your ceremony is custom-made and special to you and not simply an item on an agenda to check off before moving on!
So here in this blog, we provide you with the information about why hiring an experienced rabbi matters for your wedding ceremony. Stay tuned with this blog.
More Than Just “Saying the Words”
When you hire an experienced Rabbi, you aren’t only paying to have someone stand-up at your wedding on the day of your wedding—you’re also investing years of knowledge and wisdom; and as they say the only thing better than having experience is having the right experience—an experienced Rabbi has a unique ability to provide support and calmness during high-pressure situations such as a flower girl that has suddenly decided to not sit still, a malfunctioning microphone, or gusty winds blowing while you are outside at your ceremony. An experienced Rabbi can provide you with both and will allow you, as a couple, to be completely engaged in the ceremony, as opposed to worrying about the details of how the ceremony will proceed.
Navigating the Nuances of Tradition
Jewish weddings are filled with many forms of symbolism (for example – the Bedeken to the breaking of the glass) but every couple is unique; some want strictly traditional services whilst others seek to honour their heritage by incorporating contemporary values/interfaith elements.
- Customization – An experienced Rabbi knows which aspects of the liturgy are set and which aspects can be modified to create a more personalized experience for the couple.
- Education – By taking the time to explain the reasons behind rituals, the officiant provides the couple and their guests with a better understanding of the importance of the seven blessings (Sheva Brachot) and the significance of the Chuppah within the ceremony.
- Inclusion – Skilled officiants create a warm and welcoming atmosphere for all guests, regardless of their individual faith, throughout the ceremony, by providing context around each ritual as well as a sense of community and connection.
The Pre-Wedding Journey
Having an experienced rabbi involved in your wedding preparation establishes a stronger bond between you both before your actual wedding. It is more than just “rehearsal”; it is counseling and connection with each other through numerous premarital meetings in which you talk about your relationship in detail and transition from “me” to “we.” If there are any conflicts or stressors surrounding your wedding (i.e., family tension regarding varying levels of religiousity), the rabbi can be a neutral mediator to help all parties find common ground to support the couple together while maintaining the focus on the couple. Lastly, as the rabbi listens to you share as a couple about your story (how you met, your values, future hopes, etc.), it allows him to create a personalized message for both of you that will be meaningful for your future as a married couple.
Technical Mastery and Flow
Weddings have their own rhythm. If a wedding is too quick, it feels like it flew; if too much time is spent on one aspect of the ceremony, you may lose your guests’ attention. An experienced rabbi knows how to pace a ceremony and utilize silence in a way that makes the experience more impactful, while also bringing joy to the room. The rabbi also understands the “choreography” regarding the bimah (the altar), including where people should be standing when they put the rings on one another and how to get good photos without having the rabbi in the way of the photos.
A Ceremony to Remember
Your Wedding Ceremony is the basis of your marriage. It is the most sacred part of your wedding celebration. When you select an officiant who has performed numerous wedding ceremonies under the Chuppah, you are selecting someone who shares your respect for the sanctity of the event. They will ensure that all of the legal aspects (such as the signing of the Ketubah) of the wedding ceremony are executed correctly, and that the spiritual aspects will be handled appropriately.
Conclusion
The wedding ceremony is a significant event in your life. Rather than taking the standard “one-size-fits-all” approach, your wedding should reflect both ancient ceremonies and modern celebrations. Selecting an officiant who understands the depth of a Jewish Wedding will allow you to celebrate your wedding day with the care and experience that it is entitled to. Rabbi Ron Broden brings this type of experience and commitment to all of the couples he marries. He values old world values and officiates the ceremony as if it were the only wedding he has ever performed, creating a magical introduction to life together. When the glass breaks and the “Mazel Tov” sounds fill the air, you will be pleased you had a qualified professional to help guide you.
FAQs
We aren’t very religious. Will an experienced rabbi still work with us?
Certainly! This is where experience really matters. A seasoned rabbi recognizes that no two couples have the same spiritual journey. He or she doesn’t judge you for not knowing every Hebrew prayer; rather, he or she will assist you in selecting the traditions that fit your relationship. An experienced officiant can create an authentic ceremony for you regardless of whether you want a traditional-light or a very secular ceremony, and will do so without making it feel like a lecture.
Can we customize the ceremony, or is it a set script?
When working with Rabbi Ron Broden, your ceremony is not going to be a “cookie-cutter,” but will include a number of traditional elements such as the ring exchange or providing the Seven Blessings. However, you’ll also be able to incorporate your own unique story into this experience. As a rabbi, Rabbi Broden encourages couples to include personal recitations as well as add their own personal vows to the ceremony. Each couple will blend together the traditional elements and more modern aspects of their own love story through this process.
What happens if our families have different religious backgrounds?
For couples, having an experienced rabbi officiate their wedding is extremely important. An experienced rabbi will help create a warm and welcoming environment for all attendees at both the ceremony and reception. An experienced rabbi will explain all the meanings behind each ritual in English to your non-Jewish family and guests, thereby providing them an opportunity to feel included rather than like mere spectators to a ritual that they do not understand. An experienced rabbi will also take the time to create a ceremony that reflects the couple’s and families’ values and beliefs, while still being true to the fundamental concepts shared by both couples and families (i.e., love, commitment, and family).
Do we really need to meet with the rabbi before the wedding?
You wouldn’t want to be sharing that moment with a stranger, now would you? Therefore, getting together with the rabbi prior to the wedding (in person or via video call) will help to create rapport and determine the rabbi’s “vibe.” This will allow the rabbi to incorporate things that really matter to both of you into the wedding sermon. Additionally, this will help to ease your nerves before the wedding and create a feeling of friendship and calmness for the two of you when you reach the chuppah.